Monday, March 06, 2006

Drankin' and Boobies, Jackson County style

Jackson County is considering tonight whether to allow strip clubs in the county, all of which have to be in "industrial" zones and therefore not in the county's nine cities, to sell alcohol. The county is considering a liquor-by-the-drink ordinance in four months (beer and wine by the drink was already approved earlier this year by the commission). The commissioners apparently want to assure the residents of the county's cities that allowing liquor-by-the-drink won't mean allowing tittie bars in the cities (doesn't their zoning already cover this?).

Can we let this puritanical crap go once and for all? Look, if there's anybody who needs the option of buying liquor by the drink, it's a patron of a Jackson County tittie bar (are there actually any of these, by the way?). Looking at nekked meth-whore moms in their late 20s-but-looks-like-late 40s can get pretty rough, and whiskey goggles can help out a lot.

But in all seriousness, let it go Jackson County. Let the tittie bars sell liquor, let the restaurants sell liquor. Oh, and while we're at it, I haven't forgotten about you ACC; take away those nipple blankies.

1 comment:

Fishplate said...

I think zoning could be trumped easily in a court case, whereas a law would be harder. My thinking is that the only way Jackson County has a chance at all with liquor by the drink is by eliminating all other objectional behavior.

My personal feeling is that, if you want a shot of Jack while you're looking at a titty that you can't touch, I don't see why anyone else would object. However, every person who lives in Jackson County is (or should be) aware of the status quo, and if they want to have a nip while they look at a nip, they are capable of moving elsewhere.